I felt this weird sense of excitement… but also a sudden sense of dread. What if we vote the (clearly) wrong way again? What if Britain does a Britain? I’m scared, Ian.
That he started with the one thing people quite liked him for, and yet that still fucked over millions of people, said everything. “Please remember be for furlough,” he begged. Oh, I will. You abandoned me and millions of others. And my Tory MP’s response was: “Everyone has to make sacrifices.”
As for the rest of the speech, it says everything that even the weather doesn’t like Sunak now.
Also bringing up the pandemic surely reminds many of Partygate, Boris Johnson's lies and - in my view - perjury before a parliamentary committee, and Sunak himself being fined for covid regulation violations?
I was going to type, "Ian, try not to enjoy this too much" but I was laughing too hard. Oh this timeline is the stupidest, but sometimes, sometimes...it just delivers. Cheers, mate 🍻
Sunak, pisspoor replicant, finally cornered by Starmer/Harrison Ford -
“I've seen things you people wouldn't believe... Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion... I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain... Time to die.”
The Wally with no brolly - honestly it could not be more of a fitting end than if what was pouring down on Sunak yesterday was the sewage from the seas and rivers he chose to polute. My son is 5 he watched the speech with me as I said it was important and history he looked at this pathetic man by his lecturn barely being heard pelted with rain and said who is that mummy I said that is the Prime Minister the most important man in the country other than the King, he looked at me in disbelief a look we can all resonate with for the duration Sunak has been in office, I said he's also one of the richest men on the country and he looked at me and said why doesn't he buy a brolly then he looks so silly. - from the mouth of babes folks. The 'rallying' election launch followed with a media campaign that sky news was physically in North Korea style removed from by heavies and you only need to zoom in on the faces of the perplexed angry and doomed cabinet ministers behind their literally washed out leader to know it's all over. It's not the 90s and Starmer is not Blair but as the song that ran out from the tannoy of the gates of Westminster boomed out in imbecile timing one thing is true things can only get better because nothing could ever be worse than that spectacle of 13 years of incompetence yesterday. Roll on the 4th of July and the hangover il have on the 5th.
Things… can only get wetter, can only get wetter….
I felt this weird sense of excitement… but also a sudden sense of dread. What if we vote the (clearly) wrong way again? What if Britain does a Britain? I’m scared, Ian.
This tanker isn’t about to perform a 180
Honestly…
It was just so beautiful
Roaringly funny and utterly pathetic.
Such a beautiful gift to us all from wounded-rodent Rishi
The man with a plan, but without an umbrella. Strategy ace.
That picture of him in the rain, soaked to the skin, will be used in every appraisal of his time as PM.
What do we make of “a man with a plan” but without, as my Gran used to say “the sense to come in out of the rain”?
It gets better. A Sky reporter has been filmed being manhandled out of their first campaign event.
That he started with the one thing people quite liked him for, and yet that still fucked over millions of people, said everything. “Please remember be for furlough,” he begged. Oh, I will. You abandoned me and millions of others. And my Tory MP’s response was: “Everyone has to make sacrifices.”
As for the rest of the speech, it says everything that even the weather doesn’t like Sunak now.
Also bringing up the pandemic surely reminds many of Partygate, Boris Johnson's lies and - in my view - perjury before a parliamentary committee, and Sunak himself being fined for covid regulation violations?
Rishi getting pissed on as he announced the GE was quite the metaphor.
I was going to type, "Ian, try not to enjoy this too much" but I was laughing too hard. Oh this timeline is the stupidest, but sometimes, sometimes...it just delivers. Cheers, mate 🍻
Fucking beautiful, Ian!
Agreed. I’m going to have to move to a paid subscription now.
Do it!
Sunak, pisspoor replicant, finally cornered by Starmer/Harrison Ford -
“I've seen things you people wouldn't believe... Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion... I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain... Time to die.”
The Wally with no brolly - honestly it could not be more of a fitting end than if what was pouring down on Sunak yesterday was the sewage from the seas and rivers he chose to polute. My son is 5 he watched the speech with me as I said it was important and history he looked at this pathetic man by his lecturn barely being heard pelted with rain and said who is that mummy I said that is the Prime Minister the most important man in the country other than the King, he looked at me in disbelief a look we can all resonate with for the duration Sunak has been in office, I said he's also one of the richest men on the country and he looked at me and said why doesn't he buy a brolly then he looks so silly. - from the mouth of babes folks. The 'rallying' election launch followed with a media campaign that sky news was physically in North Korea style removed from by heavies and you only need to zoom in on the faces of the perplexed angry and doomed cabinet ministers behind their literally washed out leader to know it's all over. It's not the 90s and Starmer is not Blair but as the song that ran out from the tannoy of the gates of Westminster boomed out in imbecile timing one thing is true things can only get better because nothing could ever be worse than that spectacle of 13 years of incompetence yesterday. Roll on the 4th of July and the hangover il have on the 5th.
Excellent piece. Really nails the weirdness of the whole event
What will the front cover of the next Private Eye have on it?
Got mine today so the print deadline was well passed. And by the time they have to do another one the shitshow will have got much worse.
Bring it the fuck on!!!
I wonder if Remainiacs had finished recording before the announcement; that would make Friday's show surreal.